talks about being lonely
make me even lonelier.
talk about doing good
never made me holier.
well i’m not doing so well,
closer never opener.
at 4am i’ll dive into sheets
could always be soberer.
wake up in the morning
feeling like i never tried.
i wake up in the morning
while the sun’s still on the rise.
i hope that it burns bright
today cause i could use that shine.
but it’s constantly a struggle to find time
to stay alive.
vitals dropping lower, man,
i need to stabilize.
when to eat and what to drink
i’m losing hope and faith
as quickly as my appet-te.
don’t know what the f-ck
i’m fighting for
i put my hands aside.
while they getting their diplomas
i’ll be catching up on quotas,
loser, never moving, always using,
taking out the garbage
when depression’s on the margin
but if money’s on my mind
then why do i feel departed?
cause kaley’s telling me
to start believing in the magic
start believing in myself
before i leave or something tragic happens.
it’s a habit, i’m tryna break it,
create the happiness don’t try and fake it.
they’ll find all our footprints
imprinted in the carpet,
the dialogue of all our talks
are printed in that apartment.
the milestones that decorate
your wall will never move.
if everything just seems too much
i know i’ll look for you.
hey kourtney, what you doing right now?
we can walk around the city
see what it’s all about.
go and pick out an outfit
or wear whatever you want.
wherever you want,
pick apart a piece of your mind.
i found god in a little bit of you,
a southern angel with a halo made for two.
taking in all of those flowers you removed,
place them in your hair
or you can place them in my tomb.
but i don’t think you want to hear me talk like that
i love you cause you understand where my mind’s at.
“if you’re feeling hurt or lost, you know we got your back.”
but i feel my spine decaying, keep myself intact.
why do i feel so bad? why do i feel like this?
how do i explain to all my family that i want to quit?
not just the blood inside my veins but the ones i live with.
i’m so sorry but i’m tired of surviving at best.